3 and 4 discover Twilight!
by StitchPunk13
Summary: 3 and 4 go on a reading spree and come across a certain book... WARNING: Twilight flamey, Edward Cullen flamey. Credit goes to Schellibie for their amazing fanart that inspired this! I FINALLY FREAKIN UPDATED!
1. Twilight

XD I saw this idea from a piece of very well done fan art, and well…

(If it was yours, please drop me a note and a link, so I can confirm it and give you credit =D)

This is my first fanfiction ever, so please go easy on me.

If you like Twilight, or are an Edward Cullen fangirl, I would advise you leave this story right now. I mean no offence to the Twilight series. I just couldn't resist XD

And I have 3 and 4 as brothers, for the sole reason that it was pointed out in a review that 7 is the only girl. (Plus I like it better that way ^^)

Disclaimer: I OWN NOTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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3 and 4 were racing around the library that was now their home, searching for new things to catalogue. Anything. They were bored out of their trees. They had already gone through the children's books, the fantasy section (3 had quite enjoyed Harry Potter), the educational stuff, and the entire horror sector (which had scared the bejezzus out of poor 4)

Until, that fateful day had brought them to the teen romance section.

"Brother!" 3 blinked to his older brother. "I do believe I found something!"

4 immediately ran to his older brothers side. "Do share, 3!"

3 vigorously pointed at the partially burned title. "Twilight. Hmm… what on earth do you think it could be about? Perhaps some sort of hideous extraterrestrial creation, or maybe yet another book of the horror genre?" The last book he had read was a mix of aliens and ghosts.

He was half right.

"I say, sounds fascinating!" 4 'said'. "The title I don't get at all… maybe if we read the back." He flipped it over with little difficulty and began flickering through the words on the back.

" 'About three things I was absolutely positive. First, Edward was a vampire.' "

"Sounds intriguing!" 3 grinned.

" 'Second, there was a part of him- and I didn't know how dominant that part might be- that thirsted for my blood'."

"Oh yes, this one will most definitely be a good read"

" 'And third, I was unconditionally and irrevocably in love with him…' " 4 stopped.

"Wait, what?"

4 blinked, and then reread the back. "Yes brother, that appears to be the description."

"Well… not my first choice, but we might as well read it."

"Indeed."

They opened the cover and began the first page.

7 found the twins in states of shock; opticals widened, limbs rigid. "3! 4!" She ran over and shook them, hoping to break them out of their stupors.

4 sprang up suddenly. "3!"

3's opticals widened slightly as he slowly woke up. "So- terrible…" He shuddered, and curled into a tiny ball on the floor, twitching slightly.

4 looked around wildly, and then spotted 7. "DON'T READ THE BOOK!!!!! DON'T!!!!" He shook her shoulders with as much force the tiny stitchpunk could manage, then bounded off as though his life depended on it.

Of course, 7 had no idea what 4 had just said. "Okay… 3? You okay…?"

3 jumped up like a jack-in-the box and ran after his brother, all the while flickering his eyes.

"BURN THE WITCH!!!!!!"

"Um… I'll take that as a yes…?" 7 sat down on the wooden floor. "Hmm… I wonder what happened to them…" She peered over at the document that the twins appeared to have been reading. "Tw-twi-li-light?" She was a fighter, not a reader. "Twilight. Hmm… looks good enough..." She bent over the crisp pages and began reading.

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XD Terrible? I'm not sure, all I know is that if you hate Twilight, join the club! Please R&R, no flames =)


	2. New Moon

The sequel. The twins still haven't learned their lesson and decide to give New Moon a shot.

Not as good as the first chapter in my eyes, but still okay ^^

And sorry for such shortness, the next chapter (if there is going to be one) will be longer ^^

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The rustle of pages turning filled the quiet air, disturbing the peacefully floating dust motes. A loud thud, the dragging sound of paper against wood.

"Well brother, that was a most productive read." 3 flickered to his older brother, now looking back at the book they had just catalogued, The Jungle Book.

"Indeed. Pray tell, what shall we pursue next?"

"Hmm…" The twins looked at each other, quite stumped.

"Say, did 2 ever find out what happened to 7?" 4 suddenly asked.

"Um… I believe she had blown a fuse through her opticals and main brain system."

"Ah."

"Mm hmm."

"Perhaps we should pay her a visit."

"Perhaps."

4 turned and leapt up on a moulding copy of Carrie to reach the open dust covered window. He turned his head to beckon his older brother when it caught his eye. "What's that book?"

3 turned around eagerly in the direction 4 pointed. There lay a frayed black book with a strange white and red flower gracing the cover. The twins keenly scampered over to read the cover. Then, 3 froze. "Brother."

"Yes?"

"T-this book reminds me quite a bit of that other book…"

"Y-you mean-"

"DO NOT SPEAK ITS NAME!"

4 flickered down nervously. It was 3 who had bravely read through all 24 chapters of pure torture while he had gone into shock after reading the bilge about vampires sparkling. Vampires do not sparkle. Unless they have some sort of vampiric disease, they do not sparkle. 4 had therefore assumed that Edward Cullen had an undying STD.

"I'm sorry, brother. So…" 4 flickered nervously. "…Should we read it?"

3 glanced nervously over at the copy of New Moon. "Um…"

"How about I read it and you take a break?" 4 flickered kindly, putting his mechanical hands on the cover tenderly.

" A-are you sure…?"

"Yes, brother. Some one has to catalogue it."

"So…awful…"

4 wrapped his arm around 3 and let him sit down on the rotting wooden floor. "It'll just take me a second."

ONEBOOK READING LATER

4's opticals were wider than the moon, staring with nothing but pure terror at the text in front of him. His hands were shaking and the squeaking noise barely audible could be safely presumed as whimpers.

3 stared frightfully at his brother. "It's okay 4. We're going to take you to 2, and he's going to help you, okay?"

"O-okay." 4 nodded, twitching slightly.

3 gingerly lead his brother to the old inventors workshop. He flickered urgently at 2, who was currently tending to 7.

7 peered over at 3, a kind of wild look deep in her opticals. "The book. Destroy the book." She growled almost Golem like.

3 flickered a nervous 'hello' back while 2 looked over 4, who was now gnawing on his own left arm.

"Well 3, I can safely presume that 4 was received serious brain damage. What happened to him?"

3 pointed solemnly to 7.

"I see. Well, he should stay with me here for a little bit. It seems that there is no quick way to fix this ailment, just slow therapy treatment."

3 nodded sadly, and sat down next to 4, stroking his back comfortingly. "Will you be alright brother?"

"SMURFS!!!!!!!"

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Moral of the story: DO NOT READ TWILIGHT! XD

If I get good reviews and such, I'll continue the Twilight legacy till book four. Please RxR, no flamey =] This was a bum chapter, I apologize it wasn't as good as the other, but I do have a better idea for book 3 =]

And if I made you want to hug 3 and 4, that's good enough for me ^^


	3. Eclipse

I know I haven't written in probably forever, and I sincerely apologise It feels so good to be bad making fanfiction again!! =D but enough of my pointless drabbles, on with the story! I also apologise for 4 and 5's inexcusable potty mouths.

* * *

5 cursed under his breath.

"Damn."

Light gleamed across it's metal back like a sword as the great cat advanced. Sharp pins of fear poked and stung at 5 as he staggered back. The rotted wood floors creaked ominously, whispering _runrunrunrun_. But it was to late to run, or even hid. Trapped, as helpless as a fish on a fryer, 5 thought bitterly. Guess it is true what they say in the song, no good deed goes unpunished.

The cat turned its head, eyes glowing terrible red.

"All I wanted do was bring a book to consol 3, and _this _happens**."** 5 swallowed. Fear jarred his vision, shaking the room violently. Or maybe it was just him. Either way, when the beast lunged with his horrible teeth, 5 ran smack-dab into a black, decaying book that surely must have been hard as stone. He stumbled back, a fatal error. The beast brought down it's great metal claw down.

And 5 screamed like a kid watching Discovery Channel who just figured out how Mufasa and Simba ate. He scrambled forward, and desperately hid underneath the black cover, quaking in fear.

"Huh?" 5 peeked out like a puppet, his breathing ragged. Then, relief washed over him.

The Cat lay, twitching. Smoke curled up from it's broken body. Sparks hissed and crackled in the air.

It was dead. Or at least as dead as a robot could possibly get.

Still quivering, 5 stuck out a finger, and anxiously poked the metal skeleton. Nothing.

Struck dumb by his luck, 5 stumbled back, resting on the book. He began to laugh, short breathy laughs you'd hear from either a happily surprised man or a mad man. Either way, he was _alive_!

5 then noticed the pattern on the book. "Oh, cool." He traced the pale red ribbon on the cover. This looked like a nice book. 5 lifted open the first page. He stumbled on a few words, not being a very avid reader himself, but in the end he managed the entire page.

"_Some say the world will end in fire,  
Some say in ice.  
From what I've tasted of desire  
I hold with those who favor fire.  
But if it had to perish twice,  
I think I know enough of hate  
To say that for destruction ice  
Is also great  
And would _suffice."

I bet 3 would like this, 5 thought to himself. He's always reading deep stuff like this. 5 tied the book securly to the remains of a rollerskate, and dragged it back home.

_~BACK HOME~_

3 was pacing frantically. Everyday, it was either, "He's almost cured." or "Just a few more days." from 2. 3 was feeling royally pissed off. Every time 5 or 9 would say patronizingly, "He'll be fine," 3 would mentally tell then to drown in a lake. It wasn't like him to be this mean. Just the opposite. But 3 loved his younger brother more than anything in the world.

Only 6 got it. He didn't sugarcoat or tell off 3 for being rude. Not that he would have anyways. But he would listen, or at least try to, when 3 ranted about how the others treated him like a child, when in truth, he was older than all of them. How they treated 4 like a minor inconvenience. Then 6 would stop sketching for a moment, look up, and merely say, "7 is sick as well. They are worried too." And then perhaps doodle a bunny.

Then 3 would feel bad, and mentally apologise. Then ask how 4 was doing, and start the circle again.

5 came bounding around the corner, towing the rollerskate behind him. "3! I got a surprise for you!!!!!"

3, who was currently sulking, looked up.

"It's a book." 5 tugged at the string.

"…"

"You like reading them, right?"

"_Yes, in fact I do. Thank you for paying that much attention to me. I should be honoured that an immatue child such as myself is worthy of a surprise such as this. Thank you for excusing my unnessesary behavior. It was foolish of me to be worried about my brother. You were right. Who gives a bloody damn anyways."_

*what 3's expression looked like on the outside*

T.T

5 shifted uncomfortably, "Well… if you don't want it…"

3 sighed, then took the rope from 5 and gave him a forgiving smile. He was just trying to help things. 3 pulled the skate closer, and looked at the cover of the book.

_Eclipse_

"AAAAHHHH!!!!!"

"Holy balls, 3 can talk!!"

* * *

Whoever said the last line is up to you ^^ again, I apologise for the what was probably a half year wait XD I've been busy, but that's no excuse =P I will be continuing this story when I can. So… I guess no one really reads Eclipse… and I screwed it up, thinking that 3 was the one with the mental breakdown at the end of chapter 2, but I fixed that ^^ So 3 read book one & survived, 4 read book two and didn't make it, and now 3 is worried. Yep, I got it ^^ Now... who for Breaking Dawn...?

1: *walking by*

Me: AHAH!!!

1: *crochety old man frown* What?

Me: Nothing… just thinking of a good way to get revenge on you for being a turdmister in the movie..

1: Turdmister?

Me: Or would you prefer wanker?


	4. Breaking Dawn

Hello readers! I've finally found the time and mental energy to finish writing about the horrible saga known at twilight D: Those poor stitchpunks won't know what hit them…

And I know it's been literally a YEAR since I've updated…. this has been my first story with more than 1 chapter, so I'm just getting used to deadlines and such. Again, I'm am so so so sorry readers hopefully this makes it up to you.

* * *

1 was sulking outside of 2's workshop. Now that the tiny group was out two valuable members, he was even more bad tempered that usual. Tired of waiting, he pounded his fist against the makeshift door.

"Have you been doing nothing this whole time?"

Calmly, 2 looked up from his study. Almost everyone had been affected by the loss of their comrades, minus 2 and 6. And if 2 was affected, he certainly put on a good show.

"I'm doing all I can, 1." 2 chuckled. "Sometimes I wonder if your impatience doesn't make you the youngest of us all."

1 growled. "How can you be joking at a moment like this? If we are attacked, surely 7 and 4 will be left behind. We cannot afford to loose any of our numbers!"

"Y'know, you really aren't making things better by shouting about them." 5 appeared at the door timidly, carrying in a metal spoon. "Of course, that's only my opinion, but-"

Creeeeeeeeeeeak

5 broke off as 3 appeared at the door. Ever since the little stitchpunk had uttered his first word/sound, he'd completely withdrawn from the group and hadn't spoken since. Often now he'd be sitting with 6, watching him draw endless patterns and symbols with no meaning, at least not to him.

Today, however, 3 was dragging 6 behind him, determination set in his adorable sewn mouth. 6 looked just as confused as the others did when 3 practically threw him in front of 2 and pointed vigorously.

"What is the meaning of this?" 1 glared from 3 to 6.

_point point point_

"3, we can't understand you anymore than when you pointed the first time."

_Up yours, 5. _

2 kindly placed a metal hand on 3's shoulder. "Can 6 explain why you brought him here for you?"

3 nodded, but 6 remained stunned as ever. He looked shyly up a 2, and handed him a scrap piece of paper.

"It's…. it's a glassman…" 6 said unhappily. The drawing was of a young, god like figure with arrays of light bouncing off of him, sparkling and glinting in the paper sun. 2's optics blinked.

"I see."

3 gave 6 a dirty look.

"I don't get it, what's the big deal?" 5 looked nervously around the room.

3 walked over and kicked 5. He still had sore feelings over 5 bringing that …. _book_…. into his presence.

"Aaaaaah! 3, what the hell?"

3 rounded on 5, having enough of his idiocy.

_My brother is in a reading induced coma and nobody's doing shit about it! Don't act so surprised; I'd imagine you'd be pissed off too. Unlike me, you probably wouldn't have the balls to do anything about it. You'd just hide underneath a tin can and worry, because in the magical world of 5, worrying solves everything. Hey, 9 just fell into a sea of poison tipped spikes! Worry for half and hour, and he's back in mint condition. Oh noes, 7 just got eaten by a Cat monster! Wait a minute, we have worrying on our side! Yaaaaaay! Let's see how effective worrying is against my fist from punching you in the throat!_

"3!" 9 arrived in the workshop just in time to see 3 tackle 5 to the ground. He pulled the smaller stitchpunk, arms flailing, into the air.

"You need to calm down!" 5 held out his arms in defence, slowly walking towards 9 and 3. "Just tell me what I did wrong, please! I didn't mean to upset you."

"He's right, 3." 2 looked pointedly at 3.

Giving up, 3 wormed out of 9's grasp and headed for the room his brother was in.

_Brother… how're you feeling?_

4 glanced over at 3. His face was set in a frown of concentration as he turned the page of the Dr. Seuss book he was reading. Or maybe he was just looking at the pictures, 3 couldn't tell.

3 sat in there for who knows how long, watching his brother struggle through the simple children's book. It wretched his heart to see what had happened to him, although there's no shame in reading Dr. Seuss if you're not a kid…. Looking over at 7, 3 smiled weakly. She was clumsily tying a needle head to a stick, fashioned after her old trusty weapon. They were improving…

He left to go grab some reading material. It was kind of boring sitting in the same room doing nothing all day, but 3 didn't want to leave the two alone. He dragged the book closest to the door inside and scanned the cover.

_Harry Potter and the Philosophers Stone_

3 smiled. His all time fav, right on. Flipping open to the first page, he began. At first he didn't take much notice into 4 reading over his shoulder. But then, the unthinkable happened.

4's mechanical brain started whirring quickly, loud and steady. Startled, 3 jumped away. He watched as his brothers' optics blinked rapidly, then opened wide, staring at the paper.

_4…? Are… are you okay?_

3 watched his brother, not daring to get his hopes up, and yet…

_3…. I AM GOING TO CUT STEPHANIE MEYERS IN HALF WITH THE EDGE OF A COIN._

4 tackled his brother in an embrace. 3 remained limp in shock, but then suddenly clung to his other half. A smile stretched across his cloth face.

_I missed you 4!_

_The feeling is mutual, 3. So tell me_- he withdrew and looked 3 in the opticals- _what did I miss?_

At this, 3 looked over at 7. _You see 7? Well…she read the …. it too. So her mental well being was compromised as well._

_Can we not cure her the same way I was cured?_

_I'm not sure… 7 doesn't read._

_Well… maybe she watches movies_

~ONE HARRY POTTER MARATHON LATER~

"Holy fishsti- what happened to me?" 7 shook her head. "It feels like someone stuck my brain in a microwave."

Victory! The twins looked at each other with triumph.

_Shall we go tell the others that you are cured, 4?_

_Yes, lets!_

~IN 1'S STUDY~

"I still don't understand what all the hullabaloo is about these books." 1 glared at the book currently in front of him. He couldn't pretend he wasn't slightly curious though…

"Maybe just one chapter…" He lifted the cover of Breaking Dawn and began to read.

* * *

CLIFFHANGER! Dun dun duuuuuuuuuuuuuun D: naw, I think I'm done the series for now, but I may right an after-story thingy (prologue or epilogue or what?), depending on time and such. Thanks to all me reviewers ;') you guys are the bomb-diggity!

If you like you can leave me ideas for what happens to 1, if he becomes a vegetable, or if he's affected at all… you never know with that guy/dolly thing. Thanks again!

btw all the stitchpunks had a huge celebration and lived happily ever after cause they shoved Twilight down that octopus machine soul stealing thingys throat. And yes, Harry Potter saves lives. Lame ending, but I'm a sucker for a happy ending :)


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